Passion to Paper
I haven’t written in a while
My inner being was uninspired
My thoughts were not beguiled
The many times I needed to scribeBut failure to initiate
Lead to paper to excite
Excite my senses and awaken my passions
And feel the beautiful waves of emotion
by Sonya Derian
“If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I will tell you, I came to live out LOUD.” ~Émile Zola
1. Live your life on purpose. Not on “default.” Be Proactive. Make conscious and deliberate choices. When you don’t choose, circumstances choose for you and you are never leading: you are following or catching up—or worse, living in “default” mode.
2. Utilize your full potential. Give what you’re doing your best and fullest attention. Be here now. Even if you’re not where you want to be, giving it half your effort doesn’t move you forward. Master what you have at hand, for the sake of mastering it and something will shift.
3. Overcome your fear. Get out of your comfort zone. Find out you have a pulse. Let something give you butterflies in your stomach. This is how you know you’re alive—how you grow into something new. Every fear overcome is a freedom gained. Don’t know how to overcome fear? Do the thing you’re afraid of. Cross them off the list. Make it a game. Pretty soon, you will be invincible.
4. Discover a new talent. One of my favorite quotes by Martha Grimes is, “We don’t know who we are until we see what we can do.” But we don’t find this out until we try something new. Learn a new instrument, take an art class, play with a digital camera, sign up for a salsa class, take up cooking, plant a garden, join toastmasters, pick up a needle and thread, try mountain climbing, go scuba diving, camping or kayaking. Find something that interests you and explore it. You never know what will come out of it.
5. Honor your word. When you strip everything else away, your word is all you’ve got. Do what you say you’re going to do. By honoring your word, you honor yourself. And it doesn’t feel good when you don’t. So, make it a habit. Value your integrity and keep your promises. It’s a good life practice. It’s a good business practice.
6. Create a new habit or break an old one. Who has dominion over your life—you or your habits? Make it a game. How many things can you get under your control? How many bad habits can you convert? There is a great sense of empowerment when you feel you are in charge of your life. This helps you get there.
7. Pay a stranger a compliment. Not only does it make someone else feel good, but it makes you feel good to compliment someone else. All of the sudden the world is small and the stranger next to us becomes our friend and we recognize that we’re all in this together.
8. Take yourself out on a date. Treat yourself. Bring a book. Bring something you’re working on. Bring a journal and use it to write up all the amazing qualities that you want in a partner or a friendship when it comes your way. Find somewhere that has music or wireless and plant yourself there. Have a meal, enjoy it. Treat yourself. You deserve it. Living out loud is playing out loud whether you have someone to join you or not. And you never know who you might meet or strike up a conversation with.
9. Take 100% responsibility for your life. If things aren’t working out in your favor, take note and ask yourself what your part in it is. Being a victim is passé, boring. There is no power in blaming other people. Don’t wait for other people to change. When you change, your world will follow suit.
10. Live in the question. There is nothing you cannot be, do or have. So do not impose limitations on yourself. Instead of saying you can’t get there, ask “How can I get there?” Live in the affirmation of possibility rather than the declaration of negativity. There is always a way, and it is being presented consistently, but you have to live in the question to be on the lookout for the answer.
11. Make more decisions for yourself. There is great power in making a decision. It’s a declaration. You don’t know what you want? Then look at what you don’t want and work backwards. I bet you do know what you want; you just haven’t been in the habit of asking yourself. Hey. That’s a new habit to change! (See #6)
12. Learn to say “No.” To live your best possible life, you need to learn how to say no to the things that aren’t serving you. The best barometer to measure this by is: if it isn’t a “hell yeah” (yippee, so fun, can’t wait), then it is most probably a no. If you have to talk yourself into it, it’s a no. Once you get comfortable saying no, everything becomes a matter of choice. Living a life of choice is a living a life of freedom.
13. Know your own value. Others may be more educated, skilled or talented in one or another area, but there is something magnificent and valuable about what you have to offer this world that, in comparison, is equal. Do not allow yourself or anyone else to diminish it. You have a learning disability? So did Dr. John Demartini and that’s what makes him the most powerful speaker today. Joe Vitale came from homelessness. Look at him now. Stop idolizing anyone else’s gifts and dismissing your own.
14. Give yourself permission. For everything. Permission to make mistakes. Permission to shine. Permission to look beautiful. Permission to accept (instead of correct or dismiss) praise. Permission to have bad days. Permission to get angry. Permission to cry, to laugh, to scream. Permission to take the day off. Permission to take a nap, go to sleep early. Permission to get a massage. Permission to do nothing. Permission to succeed. Life is about being here now, in all your full range of emotions, mood swings, wins and losses. Give yourself permission to live out loud today.
15. Own your own opinion. No one has to agree with you in order for your opinion to matter. Stop waiting for consensus. YOU matter. Your opinion matters. The nature of Living Out Loud is that some people will agree with you and some people won’t. You will NEVER get consensus. So, stop looking for it. The only question you have to ask is, does your opinion matter to you? Claim it. Own it. And know that with new information, it could change tomorrow. Life is transitory. Live in the evolution.
16. Do not punish yourself for past actions. Your past behavior was what you’ve done, but it is not who you are. Who you are is still unfolding. Mistakes, errors in judgments, and failures all add to our character and value. They make us human and compassionate and wise. To berate yourself for acquiring these valuable qualities is wrong, so stop it. A new beginning starts today.
17. Live in the realm of “possibility” rather than “probability.” Stay open at the top. You don’t know what the outcome can be. Statistics are made up of groups. You are an Individual. Be the individual that charts your own course. You don’t know what is possible for you until you find out.
18. Do not argue for your limitations, but instead focus on your strengths. We all have weaknesses, but we also have our strengths. What do you do well? Practice that. When you lead with your strengths, the rest follows suit. And miraculously, your limitations sort of disappear. What you focus on grows.
19. Practice gratitude. In a world of imperfections, it’s amazing how perfect things actually are. But sometimes we have to look for them. When your life’s circumstances aren’t working in your favor, the one thing you do have control over is your attitude. If you lead with gratitude, and create a habit of it, in short order, your life will change.
20. Be authentic. Thoreau said, “If I am not I, who will be?” Did you ever notice that the ones who are most successful are not the ones that follow the masses and trends, but the ones who stand in their own authentic expression and declare who they are? Regardless of who agrees with them? There is an expression that is uniquely yours and to dismiss it, is to dismiss the divine.
21. Own your own power. The answers are not outside of you. Own what you know. The more you practice this, the more you hone the powerful magnetic field that surrounds you and the more power you emit in your convictions, knowing and in your life. Your results will confirm this.
22. Stop Complaining. Complaining is a form of passive victimhood. Ask yourself instead, why is this happening to me and what part do I play in this picture? Then work on your part of the solution. Have you ever found yourself not setting a boundary and allowing someone to take advantage of you? Or not taking care of yourself in a situation and getting burned by the outcome? We are always the single common denominators in our lives and we are the only ones we have control over. Use what you are complaining about as your inner clues as to where you need to start taking better care of yourself.
23. Practice “being” and have nothing to prove. Know your own value with or without results. Your value is in your human being-ness not your human doing-ness. In a society that is wrapped up in image, this is sometimes difficult to practice. People ask what you do, not who you are. But a person who knows their own value, does not have to prove it.
24. Be of service. Offer your help where you can and do your part in making the world a friendly place. We are all in this together. As Gandhi preached: be the change that you wish to see happen. You would be surprised by the impact you have.
25. Love generously. Spread random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty. Hatred is already rampant. We need to tip the scales the other way. Love is a far more powerful emotion and has far reaching consequences. Living out loud means loving Out loud. And ironically, the more you love, the more love you have to give.
26. Find your bliss and live your passion. Again, don’t know what that is? Then it’s time to find out! Your emotions give away clues. When your life has spun out of control and you are finding yourself in a tizzy, go back to what makes you happiest and do that. The more you follow this thread, the more you are leading with the heart. There are always ways to monetize your passion, to find ways to make a living at what you love, but first you have to discover it. Your emotions don’t lie. Follow their lead.
27. Stop waiting. Life is happening right now. Don’t wait for the right career, the perfect relationship, the landfill of money. Make the best of what you have right now and be creative with it. Don’t put your life on pause. Live with the possibility that what you are waiting for can arrive tomorrow, and live your best life today.
28. Let other people off the hook. They didn’t mean harm, and even if they did, it hurt them more than it hurt you. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and rise even taller. Don’t use anyone as your excuse to shirk your responsibility to live a bigger life. Victimhood is not a badge of honor. Overcoming adversity is. Use success and joy as your barometer. And march on.
29. Use co-creation to help you. We are always working in conjunction with invisible forces. They want to create on your behalf, but they are waiting for your leadership to direct them. Living out loud means acknowledging that we are a big presence with a big force of nature at our disposal. We don’t underestimate our power. We utilize it.
30. March to the beat of your own drum and stay the course. Do you hear your own music, but find yourself dancing to the tune of someone else’s beat? Stop it. Were you told at any point in your life that your own music was the wrong kind? Re-Consider. The symphony of the world’s vibration, the hum of its tune, is the sound OM (aum). Your task is to find your own Om—your life force vibration, life pattern or purpose, your song or melody . Find it, claim it, express it, and live it. Never give up on yourself. You are who you are. It’s time to honor that and make use of it. Stay the course.
For many of us, this is already a way of life. But to others, some of these practices may feel daunting. To you, I say this: just start. You may not succeed 100% of the time, but like a friend once said, “Life is a hard hat zone, we’re always under construction.”
Bloom where you are planted. Work from the inside out. Make the commitment to yourself and get started.
Find your “OM”. Claim It. Own it. Express It. Live it. You are divinely supported.
Original article: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/live-your-life-out-loud-30-ways-to-get-started/
Movember Madness
If you are growing your MO for Movember, let myself and my readers know. Pop me a mail with your MO and I’ll publish it on my blog.
I am absolutely, positively and undeniably, passionately addicted to music. I’m very sure that there are many of you reading this right now, saying: “ME TOO!”
Music is the soundtrack to my life, our lives, just like in a movie where the music changes to enhance a viewer’s experience in a specific scene, the same applies to the music in your life’s moments, making up the soundtrack to your life. You are depressed, you listen to soppy love songs, you want to party, you listen to music that will get you in the mood… So many songs speak to you and lyrics connect you to the song, capturing a moment in your life, translating it into a song that describes your emotions. Music connects you to feelings, both subliminal and conscious, and also connects you to people, reminding you that you are not alone. Think about it. When you are at a concert, the whole crowd erupts, singing in unison, reciting the lyrics off by heart, bursting with emotion? Just when you think life is great, you hear a song and out of nowhere, tears appear uninvited, and you start to feel emotions you thought you had already dealt with in your life? Or you hear a song which make memories from your past flood into your mind, reminding you of someone in your past that you had not thought of in years?
I would like to share 2 amazing songs in my life’s soundtrack with you. The musicality, the acoustic guitar, the timing of the music synchronised with my heartbeats and the beautiful lyrics being sung with vocals just oozing with personal experience. This and more connects me to my life’s rhythmic emotions.
Volcano, Damien Rice, off the album ‘O’
(the chorus tugs at my heart strings)
What I am to you is not real
What I am to you, you do not need
What I am to you is not what you mean to me
You give me miles and miles of mountainsWhat I give to you is just what I’m going through
This is nothing new, no, no just another phase of finding
what I really need is what makes me bleed
But like a new disease, Lord, she’s still too young to treat
Volcanoes melt you down
She’s still too young +what I am to you+you do not need+is not real
I kissed your mouth
You do not need me
And then this one too:
Blower’s Daughter, Damien Rice, off the album ‘O’
And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her skyI can’t take my eyes off of you
And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We’ll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower’s daughter
The pupil in denialI can’t take my eyes off of you
Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?I can’t take my mind off of you
‘Til I find somebody new…….
Music speaks to your soul in volumes, every beat in a song is in tune with the beating of your heart, every change in the rhythm bangs the drum of your personal journey through this life. Music is what feelings sound like.
I would love to hear from you. Share the lyrics or a song that recites the script of your life with me and my readers.
If you would like to hear Damien Rice’s music, click on the links below and feel your heart strings being tugged.
Volcano, Damien Rice, Album ‘O’
Blower’s Daughter, Damien Rice, Album ‘O’
Skin of my skin. Soul of my soul. Joyous glowing candle that lights my way in life and makes me live life through new eyes. The best gift anyone could be given in life. A child. My Cameron Drew Krause.
Just showing off…..
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I’ve never had the urge to place a tick next to Dubai on my list of most desirable destinations to get to in this lifetime. But I was given an opportunity that no one could refuse, which included the word FREE.
A 3 day, 2 night trip to Dubai in May, 2009 sponsored by the Dubai Tourism Board
(remember to have a look at the slide show of memories after the story)
Lady lumps in the desert
Being in the travel industry, it’s a must to experience destinations first hand so you can sell the product confidently. Knowledge is key. Off we went on Emirates Airlines, 5 ladies with a “when in Rome” attitude. Excitement mounted, keeping in mind that this was not a destination on my list of desirable destinations. But travelling and experiencing new destinations is addictive.
We arrive in Dubai at the time the sparrow released the said fart, and we were dying to just get to our hotel. Upon exiting the airport to catch our transfer to our hotel, a wave of heat smothered us. There are only 2 seasons in Dubai: Hot and hot-as-hell.
Now, as this was a trip sponsored by a tourism board, they had ensured that not a second in their prized city was left without an experience, so that we could go home and confidently promote the destination to our clients with options other than hotel, transfer and flights. It’s all about the touring of the city, it’s all about the what-more-is-there-to-the-destination, that matters. Clients, one or more, will request a random tour, and we, the experts, should be able to give the correct advice and information.
We had a few hours in our fabulous hotel rooms to freshen up. We were spoiled, put up in a 5* hotel in the Deira area, which is a 15 minute drive from the airport. Huge beds, heavenly pillows that were seductively taunting us to give them a chance (wish I had given these pillows more of my attention during my 2 night stay) and a bathroom that echoed due to its size.
The sun finally rose during our freshen-up-allocated-time, and we met the bus with other travel industry representatives from South Africa loaded in it, in front of the hotel. Our first tour was a City Tour, taking us to the Museum, the market (for the legendary Dubai shopping experience), a dhow boat ride on the Creek ending up at the Souk for more shopping. A woman’s dream!
The shopping was magnificent! You have to plan what you want to buy before you go to a market or a Souk, otherwise you will be swallowed whole into a frenzied money-spending abyss. And you have to master the art of hackling to get the right price. Do not twitch when in the negotiating phase. The people of the market are seasoned veterans. They will work on your empathy strings and tell you that the price you’re asking for will not put food in their children’s mouths, but this is their ploy to exploit you of your hard-earned shopping dollars. Leave your heart in your hotel room when you head out on a shopping spree in Dubai.
From there we toured through Deira, through the Creek area, through Bur Dubai to a mosque for a viewing. Did you know that 80% of Dubai’s population is made up of ex-pats and the 20% balance of the population are natural residents? (Now you know). Even though the majority of the population are not Muslim, the primary religion is Muslim, and this is very prominent in Dubai. Friday is the start of their weekend, no flimsy spaghetti strap dresses bearing shoulders and knees are permitted to be worn in public, during Ramadhan no eating or drinking is permitted from sunrise to sunset in public, and 70% of the hotels are dry hotels (in other words they do not serve alcohol).
En-route to the famous Jumeirah Beach, we drove past the Burj Tower (Burj Khalifa) which was then still in its building phase. Dubai is plagued with construction sites. For as long as I have been selling Dubai, it’s been under construction. But hats off to the architecture and designs. This is the true definition of out-the-box thinking and creativity.
Arriving at Jumeirah Beach, we saw the infamous Burj Al Arab, where a bottom of the range room in the off-season is R5000 per person per night. No cars are allowed to drive up to the entrance of this hotel, unless you are a resident of the hotel, a VIP or on a tour. This infamous building was truly an amazing sight to lay my eyes upon.
A bit of sightseeing and a sweat provoking hour later, we arranged with the tour bus to leave us at Wild Wadi Rum water park and we would make our own way back to the hotel, because we had 3 hours to kill before the hosted dinner that evening. We caught 2 taxis to Atlantis Hotel on the Palm and had a heart stopping, life flashing before our eyes, prayer filled experience. OMG! The taxi driver, whose services we were cursed to use, almost killed us on the road. He was a Muslim, racist. Every car on the road driving in front, behind or on his side with an ex Pat or Indian driver behind the steering wheel, seemed to appear to him as something demonic and he was obsessed with the urge to ram them off the road. 30 minutes of torment late, we arrived at the Atlantis Hotel, we flung open the taxi doors and ran inside after we threw the money at him with no tip as a survival method to save ourselves.
Atlantis Hotel on the Palm. The replica of the iconic hotel in the Bahamas. We weren’t fortunate enough to do room inspections, but we had a memorable walk around the hotel where non residents were not banned from roaming and the sights were jaw dropping.
An hour later, we made our way back to our hotel and readied ourselves for the hosted dinner. Thus far, we had not managed to sample any form of alcohol, and at dinner we were offered wine. When we each asked for a second glass of wine, we were each given a glare-stare that would make you shrink, ashamed that you acted like the ungrateful Oliver Twist asking for more.
With this, we decided that we had to get out and experience the night life with our “when in Rome” attitudes. We found a local bar where 99.9% of the people in the bar were ex Pats from Ireland, Australia and New Zealand. Of course we did our best to not pay for drinks, because 1 drink was about R50 and that was just a beer.
Many drinks later, we turned into superheroes and we showed off our talents, made many friends and were offered many drinks. One of my friends even tried to scrum a guy twice her size. The taxi ride back to the hotel was a giggle fest and the run up to the hotel room to speak to the toilet bowl, was done in superhuman lightning speed (or so we thought, I’m sure).
3 hours of precious sleep later, we had to wake up, shake up and rake up our “we can do this” attitudes off the bathroom floor and join the tour for day 2 of sightseeing.
Thank goodness we had strong stomachs. The tour for the day was a desert sand dune safari, followed by a dinner in the desert. Awesome. There was a convoy of 4×4′s driving into the desert, and then the fun started, as we were thrown around, up and down, stomachs sinking, hearts skipping a beat, adrenalin pumping, memorable moment of note. Funny enough, the hangover never repeated on any of us. We were having too much fun to think of the sickness.
A stop in the desert, and of course we tried to run up and down dunes. Looks much easier when they do it on TV.
We finally reached our harem-set-up where we were to be entertained and fed for the next 3 hours, treated like VIP’s. We took in the sunset, and whilst watching it descend on the day, it disappeared before it reached the edge of the horizon. That’s when we found out that the heat of the desert causes a “smoke screen”, a fiery haze and it looks like the sun just disappears, but it’s hidden by the haze of heat. A first time viewing experience. Tick! NOW Dubai was on my list of desirable destinations.
Food. Food. Entertainment. Camel Rides. Henna tattoos. Drink. Laughter. We were ready to go out on the town again. It was, after all, our last night in Dubai. We planned to go to the same bar we went to the previous night, because no one could suggest another venue for us. Back to the hotel we went, revised our going out outfits and got into a taxi prepared to retrace last nights tracks to the same bar. But as we drove a few kilometres from the hotel, we noticed signs up advertising a “Full Moon Beach Party” at the Atlantis Hotel. Well. We had to experience this for our client’s sake, right? Driver, Atlantis Hotel, please!
The queue to get into the Beach Party was ridiculous, and we were thinking, we were going to have to party sober because the cost of the alcoholic beverages clashed with our wallet’s magical monetary capabilities. This thought did not even manage to end in a full stop, when we were approached by 3 men asking us to pretend to be their girlfriends, so that they could get in to the party. That’s when we found out, in Dubai, men are not permitted to enter any bars or clubs without being accompanied by ladies, so we made a deal with them: we would play the role of their girlfriends, in exchange for sweet alcoholic nectar. Deal. Party was a go, and the hangover-potential was being nurtured. What a night. The music, the people, the vibe, the laughter and all that complimented an unforgettable evening was happening to us, there and then.
The party ended promptly at 2am, as all parties, clubs and bars, do in Dubai, and the taxi ride back to the hotel felt like we were on the highway to hell. The sponsored nectar that we consumed was not sitting well, because we had willingly over-indulged on it.
Finally back at the hotel, we collapsed in a pile on our beds and in a split second, being conscious was not an option.
Courtesy wake up calls rang on the room telephone only 2 hours after our collapse. The ringing sounded like a banshee in a horror movie. We had to pack and vacate our rooms in lightning speed, and make our way to the airport. We moved slow enough to not encounter any hangover-related incidents.
Hell! We were in hell, because of last nights overindulgence in fun. The longest drive to the airport, the longest check in for our flight, the longest wait in a MacDonald’s queue to grease up our fragile lifeless bodies. And finally, the long-awaited moment to collapse into our seats on the plane, had arrived, and we were able to close our eyes and sleep right through the 8 hour flight back to our home country.
Dubai made its mark on us in more ways than one, from creative jaw dropping architecture, to fantastic people, to amazing memories, to a pristine desert experience. We had slept a total of 5 hours in those 3 days, all for the sake of sacrificing ourselves to a worthy cause, which was to become specialists of Dubai, to delight our clients and their travel needs. Superheros were sacrificed, experience was rife, and memories were a plenty.
Dubai-eek! Shukran!
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Fast Facts:
Dialing code for Durban is 031
Distance from Johannesburg to Durban is 588km’s
Time it takes to travel this distance is 6 hours
Actual distance travelled 1080km’s
Actual time taken to travel this distance was 12 hours
Number of laughing fits experienced on this trip were infinite
Number of Tweeps (People from Twitter) met was 20
Number of venues we made appearances at in Durban was 10
#Planking is the art of lying flat on odd surfaces & take a picture of it
#Owling is the art of perching on an object like an owl & take a picture of it
#Koalaing is the art of acting like a koala and grabbing onto an object with all 4′s & take a picture of it Regrets? NONE ^ sign means see slideshow for picture to this part of the story
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The plan to go on a road trip to Durban to meet fellow peers from Twitter, was a very last moment one. It seemed a great idea and we’d been wanting to get down there for a while and this seemed the perfect opportunity. A quick in and out trip. Durban is only about a 6 hour drive from Johannesburg.
So we budgeted and started the hype by letting people of twitter (Tweeps) in Durban know that they were going to be invaded by us shortly. The excitement grew and we both felt as excited as kids going on holiday with their parents to the beach. Butterflies and all other excitement-related emotions were taking their effect on us.
@Elismha @dezy_d when are you road tripping down ladies—
Ferrari F1 nutter (@gordsreid) August 17, 2011
So hooligans @Dezy_D & @Elismha are making their way down here next week. Hope my liver transplant gets approved—
Michelle Gordon (@MadamMichelle) August 11, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D hey u 2 are u ready????—
Shans (@ShansDBN) August 16, 2011
So the night before the greatly anticipated road trip, Elismha and myself start having a giggle at what we were packing for a 3 night trip. We were packing as if we were moving house. I did a once over and eliminated half of what I had planned to take with and assumed Elismha would be doing the same….. The only possessions I refused to cut down were my CD’s. Music makes the road trip! I took about 90 CD’s with. We even had mascots for the trip^ and we named one of them V, after Vonimoller on Twitter.
1st problem on #031grannyholiday @Dezy_D and I have too many shoes! Fml Daisy, we need a panel van—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 17, 2011
@Elismha it's cool. We'll lose the spare wheel and stash a pair or 6 there. Where we putting the kitchen sink? #031GrannyRoadtrip—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 17, 2011
@Elismha @dezy_d shorts and slips are/is Durban designer wear you know #031grannyholiday—
Ferrari F1 nutter (@gordsreid) August 17, 2011
18th August 2011, 4am, I arrive at Elismha’s house to pick her up. All my bags (2 tog bags and a pillow) packed in the car on the left side of the boot, leaving enough space for Elismha’s anticipated 2 tog bags or similar. Bouncing out of the car, I ran and hugged Elismha and THEN I saw her luggage. A suitcase and a tog bag. But not like a miniature suitcase. No! A suitcase that a contortionist could fit into. The words slipped out of my mouth, faster than a wet body on a foofy slide lathered with liquid soap (too fast), “there better be a hot, naked man in that suitcase!^. And that’s where the laughing fits began.
@Dezy_D bitches that there better be half a naked man in my suitcase because it's massive! Well I never! #031grannyholiday—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 18, 2011
@Dezy_D @Elismha Hey Yummy Mummies! Hope it's going well, keep us posted, drive safe and sing loud! MWAH! xxx #031GrannyRoadtrip—
Trace (@pixelslave10) August 18, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D drive safely girlies, have a good breakie stop, and maybe catch u gals the weekend xxx—
Liesl de Bruin (@Liesldb) August 18, 2011
@Dezy_D @Elismha – Have a fab roadtrip ladies to #031region! Be safe!! Have a blast! ☺ —-> P.S @gordsreid you better look after my friends—
Leigh (@Leebs101) August 18, 2011
We started on the road and we both reminded each other out loud which road to take to Durban. And that being noted, we started on our merry trip, slipping the first CD of many into the CD player and started singing, laughing, chatting and enjoying the adventure ahead of us for the next 6 hours en-route to Durban. We laughed more than we had ever laughed, as if the aircon / fan was laced with laughing gas. At least our stomach muscles were getting a good exercise. I brought props to make the adventure more innocent and child-like. One of the props was a set of clown noses^ and a whistle. As we approached the first Toll gate, we decided that for the entire trip, we would wear our clown noses when we arrived at every Toll gate. Some would say that this was childish, and I would say, yes, it was childish, but I guarantee that if you were in the car, you would have been swallowed up in the moment and the fantastic atmosphere, and joined in on the road trip fiascoes.
#np Revolting Cocks – If you think I'm sexy << For @Dezy_D #roadtrip—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 18, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D oh my hat,don't look now,but there's something on ur nose!!! Drive safe—
Shans (@ShansDBN) August 18, 2011
We updated everyone and communicated with the Twitterverse and we felt that they were all accompanying us on our epic journey. I think that they had just as many laughs as we did. It felt so good to be connected with them, after all, Twitter is our other home away from home and all the Tweeps are like family that we have gotten to know and care for, otherwise we wouldn’t have thought of doing this trip. We had created a hashtag (#) so that our friends of twitter could follow the conversations and trip easily #GrannyRoadtrip.
@lizlaughalot @Elismha indeed! Can't wait to see you and the fabulous Durban clan! Oh – and see our TL for updates. #031GrannyRoadtrip—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 18, 2011
@iAvish_Karr @ShansDBN @Dezy_D @NevinSP @Elismha yes, tours start sharp at 10am. Weather permitting of course.—
Amith Gosai (@AMG133) August 18, 2011
@ShansDBN @Dezy_D @AMG133 @NevinSP @Elismha not worry @AMG133 gives tours of dbn in his spare time—
Avishkar Singh (@iAvish_Karr) August 18, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D Woohoo! Safe trip gals! Keeping an eye on you via #031GrannyRoadtrip
—
Liz Laughalot (@lizlaughalot) August 18, 2011
The first “highway” necessary toilet stop made it’s appearance. This proved to be quite an event. I pulled over under a bridge and gave Elismha some tips on relieving one-self on the open road: Open the front passenger door and back door, and you have instant privacy. Of course, this had us both in hysterics (no surprise there) and the need to go possessed me too. I was just about to run around the car from my side to assume the privacy position, when a thought came to mind. I realised I would have been standing in Elismha’s river, so I drove the car forward about a meter and then proceeded to smile from relief. Just then, it came to me, I had to #owl under the bridge. My first ever #owling photo^.
@Dezy_D @Elismha bwaahahaha I heart u two crazies—
Liesl de Bruin (@Liesldb) August 18, 2011
Back in the car, satisfied and full of laughter, we travelled the road km by km. The time it took to do 350km did not even phase us because we were having such a good time, and they say time flies when you’re having fun.
Just then a sign appeared that made alarm bells go off in my head. But these alarm bells tickled my funny bone and I burst into fits of laughter trying to get out the words “Liz, I laugh we travelled 400km’s in the wrong direction!” Cue Elismha’s laughing fit. We were laughing so much, I couldn’t drive anymore that I almost stalled the car. But the dreaded sign appeared again. BLOEMFONTEIN. Still laughing hysterically I said to Liz, “Let’s just pull into a petrol station and ask them if we are on the road to Durban”. We arrived at the petrol station and asked the dreaded question, as if we were trying to hypnotise the petrol attendant to give us a positive response. Well, we failed at being pro-hypnotists. We knew the answer before he confirmed our fears. And for the first time in 400kms we were speachless! We had driven 400kms in the WRONG DIRECTION.
OMG!!!!!! We've just driven 400km in the wrong direction!!!!! BLONDE MOMENT OF EPIC PROPORTIONS!!! @Dezy_D—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 18, 2011
That was the first time we've been speechless. Bloemfontein rocks but now we go to kzn round 2 #031grannyholiday @Dezy_D LOL!!!—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 18, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D no ways…where are you guys ?—
Jerome Naidoo (@JeromeNaidoo) August 18, 2011
RT @TrevorvanZ: #ff @Elismha and @Dezy_D Cause they've come to visit the 031…and drove 400km's in the wrong direction to get here.—
Nicola Ashe (@AskAshe) August 19, 2011
#ff @Elismha and @Dezy_D Cause they've come to visit the 031…and drove 400km's in the wrong direction to get here.—
Trevor van Zijl (@TrevorvanZ) August 19, 2011
Say it aint so! RT @Elismha: OMG!!!!!! We've just driven 400km in the wrong direction!!!!! BLONDE MOMENT OF EPIC PROPORTIONS!!! @Dezy_D—
joslyn walker (@joswalker) August 18, 2011
No! Wahaha! RT @Elismha: OMG!!!!!! We've just driven 400km in the wrong direction!!!!! BLONDE MOMENT OF EPIC PROPORTIONS!!! @Dezy_D—
Liz Laughalot (@lizlaughalot) August 18, 2011
@Elismha @Dezy_D you talking shit… bloem? really????—
No. (@m0zase) August 18, 2011
We were angry at each other, just because we didn’t want to blame ourselves. So we pull into a little town called Senekal and pulled over to ask 2 farmers for directions to Durban. We wanted to find our sense of humour again, so we put on our clown noses and asked the farmers to look at us seriously and tell us where to go. We even made them draw us a map^ (turn right in 200m and drive for 3 hours to Harrismith and then we are back on the right road).
The first 2 hours of the detour to get us back on the right road, we were so silent that an outsider would have thought we had a lover’s tiff. But we started to get our sense of humour back after we stopped for a coffee and a bit of a stretch. We went right back into full laughter mode.
We were finally nearing Harrismith, which was supposed to be our original 400km stop. We stopped for a bit of a photo shoot, taking touristy photos of the snow capped mountains just outside Harrismith^ and then finally stopped for a bit of lunch at the Spur. We were now 8 hours into the trip. Keep in mind that Durban is 6 hours from Johannesburg, if you take the right road. But we were not phased in the least by our misfortune at this time. We took it as “Things happen for a reason” because we were thoroughly enjoying our trip, the laughter, the memories and each other’s company. Oh, I did another #owling picture in Harrismith^ :)
Silliness (or more like delusional stupidity) was starting to set in from the tiredness after being awake since 4am and the way the drive was going, we would only reach Durban by 4pm, so we were looking at a total of 12 hours of driving in total. But we were still motivated for this trip. The music was still blaring, the laughter and conversation still flowing and the clown noses were still making an appearance at every Toll gate we went through.
#nowplaying Springbok Nude Girls – Blue Eyes (off best of album) @Elismha #031GrannyRoadtrip (you like? @remybfg10k)—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 18, 2011
@DanLza @Dezy_D @Elismha just a little more and you could have been in cape town???—
No. (@m0zase) August 18, 2011
#FF @Dezy_D & @Elismha The Twitter equivalent of Thelma & Louise (just wonder which of their followers is the Brad Pitt)—
Remy (@remybfg10k) September 09, 2011
Finally, we arrive in Durban, 12 hours and 1080km later. I think Adrenalin was working it’s magic up until that point, because we did not feel tired in the least (maybe mentally exhausted). We drove around Umhlanga looking for our hotel, and decided to stop and ask for directions.
Woo Hoo!!! We've reached the 1000km to Durban mark folks! You didn't tell us it was this far @Dezy_D @ShansDBN @joswalker #031grannyroadtrip—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 18, 2011
Spoke to @Dezy_D -@Elismha laughing in the back ground…. Look out durban!! 2 whirlwinds just arrived. #031GrannyRoadtrip -ya right!!!—
Bianca Pulvirenti (@stilettoB) August 18, 2011
We saw some men on a balcony having a smoke, so we stopped in front of the building and asked them for directions. They directed us to our hotel and also gave us a little advice on where to go for a little bit of a drink after we had settled in. The place is called “Cottonfields”. We thought that this was very nice of them and proceeded to our hotel.
The moment we checked in, the adrenalin checked out, and the tiredness attacked with no holds barred. We felt limp and delusional. We flopped on the bed, but we still had a tiny bit of a sense of humour left in us to take a self timed picture of us sprawled out on that bed which we aptly named it “Roadkill”^
We didn’t move for what felt like an eternity. Everything said and done at that time was mindless and numb. Shuffling our feet instead of walking. We showered and felt a little re-energised, so the ingenious idea of going out for some dinner possessed us. So we got up and went to Cottonfields, which was earlier suggested by the friendly gentlemen on the balcony. We acted like typical tourists without a clue. Seems like we should have asked our Tweep friends if going there was a good idea.
All freshened up now, energy levels back, can go for at least another 10km to umhlanga rocks to a bar with food #031GrannyRoadtrip @Elismha—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 18, 2011
@mbangoza please rescue @Dezy_D & @Elismha they are down the road at Rottenfields all on their lonesome!! May. Day.—
Michelle Gordon (@MadamMichelle) August 18, 2011
@MadamMichelle @mbangoza @Dezy_D @Elismha They're WHERE??? #rookiemistake—
Liz Laughalot (@lizlaughalot) August 18, 2011
@Dezy_D @MadamMichelle @mbangoza @Elismha Cottonfields?!?! Nooooooo! Get out of there now.—
Matthew Savides (@matthewsavides) August 18, 2011
After seeing all the warnings on twitter from our concerned friends, we scoffed down our dinner in record time, paid the bill and made a runner from Cottonfields, of course taking a few funny pics in the process^.
So we listened to our friends and went to “Luna Rossa”, which is managed by a tweep friend Rawnis Higgens, to have a few more quiet drinks before heading back to our hotel room for much needed sleep.
@Rawnis_Higgens look out for our 011 chommies @Dezy_D and @Elismha . Call if you need backup brother man!—
Michelle Gordon (@MadamMichelle) August 18, 2011
This did not turn out as planned, but the whole trip didn’t either from 4am, so you could say that we were true to form. After a few cocktails, we eventually made our way back to the hotel room at 1am. Please note, that some of the silly pictures you see in the slideshow were taken that night, like the “stopping to smell the flowers, cartwheels in the corridor, 2 tents, chip on my shoulder, Elismha with a straw up her nose, #owling outside Luna Rosa, oh and Elismha on lap (this was when someone asked us if we were a couple…..^”
We slept like the dead that night.
@Dezy_D @Elismha @MadamMichelle You had a good night, then? Glad to see you didn't go large
Liz Laughalot (@lizlaughalot) August 19, 2011
The next morning we woke up a little later than planned, again, true to form, but we were so excited to meet with Jerome Naidoo for a local spicy Bunny Chow^. We had officially met our second Tweep on our #031GrannyRoadTrip. We had a great banter and got to realise that Twitter is such an amazing tool which opens new doors in our life and the people on Twitter are truly amazing. Thank you so much for that spicy Bunny Chow, Jerome^.
Had an awesome lunch with @Dezy_D and @Elismha stunning gals who look even more hot in person. #FF yfrog.com/h7vpdmvj—
Jerome Naidoo (@JeromeNaidoo) August 19, 2011
After the delicious lunch, we decided to visit another tweep. This was not a planned visit and we didn’t actually know how to get to Trevor‘s establishment, Europa on Florida road, so we drove and prayed we would arrive there. He was surprised, not sure if he wanted to hide away though. But a fantastic tweep with a sense of humour that many would kill to have.
We have arrived at victim number 3 in #031GrannyRoadtrip – this person does not know. @Elismha (@TrevorvanZ)—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 19, 2011
And the fabulous Shanita ^ joined us impromptu as well. We had fabulous moments of laughter and a great chat over cocktails, coffee, and Shanita had her famous Whoffee (Irish coffee). Now we were getting excited for the tweetup that night (a tweetup is a meet up with people of twitter).
@Dezy_D @Elismha & @ShansDBN It was an absolute PLEASURE meeting u lovely ladies. #Legendary Have fun at Unity #tweetup Send pics!—
Trevor van Zijl (@TrevorvanZ) August 19, 2011
Fast forward to our shopping spree, and then back to our rooms, we started to dress up and ready ourselves for the much anticipated Tweetup being held at Unity. We organised a taxi, and made our way to Unity. We were overwhelmed and honoured by the number of people that were at the Tweetup. Thank you so much to the following people who were there: Joslyn, Michelle, Liz, Gordon, Nicola, Lyndon, Shanita, Bianca, Matthew, Grant.
Made it! Here with the all stars including @askashe @stilettoB @gordsreid @lizlaughalot @ShansDBN @Dezy_D @Elismha – let the games begin!—
Michelle Gordon (@MadamMichelle) August 19, 2011
After a few drinks and a delicious dinner, we made our way to House of Curries with Joslyn, Liz, Michelle and Grant. We then met Willis and Chaunce and that’s where the night went downhill (no other way to explain it in a nice way). Socialising at it’s best. I did my first #koalaing^ here.
From there we went to Czar^ meeting Pixie and met Jem Atkins and Glen, a few more drinks there and then back to House of Curries and then we ended the night at Unit11. We finally made it back to the hotel room by about 2am and passed out.
Listen here! @willis_w @Elismha @Dezy_D Don't fucking move. Wife and myself are coming for a Patron and a dop 'n all. 30mins!—
Trevor van Zijl (@TrevorvanZ) August 19, 2011
@Leebs101 @madammichelle @joswalker I don't think we'll get chipper messages from @Dezy_D and @Elismha this morning—
Ferrari F1 nutter (@gordsreid) August 20, 2011
@willis_w @Dezy_D @YourChaunce @Elismha I got rather drunk last night. I realized how drunk after I bought shares in steers.—
Trevor van Zijl (@TrevorvanZ) August 20, 2011
We didn’t surface until about 11am and the plan was to do as little as possible. Elismha brought me breakfast in bed, good ol’s MacDonald’s, and then we made our way to News Cafe to meet Genna and Michelle. I had no voice. My voice was a squeak, so bad, that dog’s would howl every time I tried to speak. And again, we had great laughs and it was awesome to get to know yet another Tweep of Durban.
@Elismha @Dezy_D. Just arrived and we are already crying with laughter—
Genna-Wae Webster (@waewest) August 20, 2011
@Dezy_D @Elismha #winning #031GrannyRoadtrip ah thx dez,it was an education+total awesome laugh a min experience,so glad I got 2 meet u guys—
Genna-Wae Webster (@waewest) August 20, 2011
@Dezy_D how's your voice? Still a hoarse-whisperer?—
Glen Bo (@standupglenbo) August 20, 2011
All this time that we had been in Durban, we hadn’t seen the beach or put our feet in the ocean yet, so we finished our drinks and went to the beach for a bit of a stroll. To see the sea was also a part of our plan, and we almost missed this opportunity. We loved the sand between our toes and the cool waves lapping up on the shore were therapeutic. We carried on walking down the beach and out of nowhere, a rogue wave attacked us, only dampening Elismha, but drenching me from top to toe, wetting my phone in the process. So I was phone-less for the last part of the trip, but it was not a problem, because we had achieved what we set out to do in Durban and the last few hours were to be quiet time for Elismha and myself. Well, at least for me. Elismha still had her phone.
The day arrived that we had to leave Durban and it’s fabulous folk. We finally made our way out of the hotel and onto the road at about 11am. The road home was faster than the road to Durban, because we took the right road. 6 hours in total.
@Dezy_D @Elismha Travel safe today girls! Lots of love xo—
Liz Laughalot (@lizlaughalot) August 21, 2011
@Dezy_D @Elismha If u ladies arrived in a town called Malmusbury, its safe to say you've taken a wrong turn somewhere.
Trevor van Zijl (@TrevorvanZ) August 21, 2011
Right, people of kzn, your town rocks, but we need some concrete… It's been a rip roaring jol… #031grannyroadtrip exit loading…—
Pixie (@Elismha) August 21, 2011
And so the end of the fabulous trip, to meet our extended Twitter family in Durban, had come to an end. We went to Durban to consummate our friendships with the fabulous tweeps of Durban and the memories will last with us forever.
#ff @ShansDBN @Dezy_D @Elismha girls just wanna have fun! Only for them would I miss my beloved #sharksrugby at #kingspark—
joslyn walker (@joswalker) August 19, 2011
I hope that Umhlanga will recover from the twin hurricanes that are @Elismha and @Dezy_D…;-)—
Jason (@mbangoza) August 19, 2011
@Dezy_D @Elismha How was your first day back? Hope you had a safe & most NB short trip home?—
Michelle Gordon (@MadamMichelle) August 22, 2011
To the craziest tweeps I know #ff @Dezy_D and @Elismha they are seriously touched! But so much fun to get down with!—
Shans (@ShansDBN) August 26, 2011
So watch this space durban tweeps, I'm gonna blog about the #031GrannyRoadtrip @Elismha—
Dezy De Lima (@Dezy_D) August 24, 2011
We get so caught up in life that we forget to live it. We tend to repeat the motto of life, parrot fashion: “Live each day as if it were your last”. But have we actually lived these words or have we drowned in that bowl of Polly-wants-a-cracker.
Recently I started noticing that I had all the symptoms of “getting caught up in life”. Check to see how many of the symptoms you relate to:
√ Dreaming about work
√ Work in an imaginary box in your office (not being aware or interacting with your work colleagues)
√ Not making time to speak to your friends during the week
√ Not spending quality time with your family or loved ones
√ Eating food at your computer
√ Working as late as your eyelids will allow you to
√ Only come up for air when you need a toilet break/smoke break
√ Having conversations but your hearing frequency is tuned to “Blah blah blah mumble” (not listening properly because your mind has drifted into your work happy place)
Shall I stop now? How many symptoms did you relate to?
Then one day you feel like you’ve been hit by a bus!! Isolating yourself from the world has resulted in you feeling all alone, that the whole world is against you, nobody understands what you are going through, nobody has as much stress as you have, you feel like you don’t have any friends (even though they’ve left 20 voice messages on your phone) and drama drama drama! *Here’s your Oscar for outstanding performance in a leading role in a drama*
Suddenly we decide right there and then, that things are going to change! YES! Change! Well, ok, after you finish this project, no next Monday… and then one of your better qualities makes an appearance, procrastination. Procrastination is a descendant of fear, fear of leaving the comfort-zone-cocoon that you have spun yourself into.
Fast forward to the part where you eventually change your mind-shift and consciously decide to “Live each day as if it were your last”. Sometimes you over-compensate this change for the better and instead of going back to the person you were before you got caught up in your isolated hemisphere, you end up launching yourself over a small hurdle with a Pole vault sending you time travelling into a world where you feel like your daily vitamins are laced with happy gas. You are on a high, and when people ask you why you are so happy, you reply, “I’m high on life”
But this is good. You are happy and that is what really matters. You start making every moment a memory worth capturing on your mental digital camera for future happy references.
“High on life”. This happy-gas-life that you are living in is where you should have been in the first place. This is the “Alpha state” of life that you should always remind yourself to be in. When you feel that the suck-happiness-out-of-life webs are starting to spin a cocoon around you, try this cocoon exorcism remedy:
§ Take out your picture album containing some of your best memories, that on a scale of 1 to “grin stupidly”, you are guaranteed to grin stupidly, whisking you back in time allowing you to relive those moments.
This should do the trick because you have distracted your mind from its cocoon-possessed state, and you are more than likely going to pick up the phone and call one of your friends that was a part of these moments with you and end up having a good laugh.
Life’s memories and moments are too precious to not experience. There is no rewind button or PVR in life, so make sure that your memory button is always on record and that you are the camera man, the director and the lead actor in your home-made movie. Remind yourself to edit the script when the story doesn’t work well with a scene in your life. Do all of this with passion as your co-star and you are guaranteed to have an award-winning movie of memories that will leave you breathless, proud and fulfilled when the final curtain falls. Who knows, you might even get a star on the walk of fame, leaving a legacy behind that will be replayed in your admirer’s minds for a long time after you have said “And that’s a wrap!”
And roll Dezy’s memory credits:
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The Greek myth about Soul Mates: (via http://www.experienceproject.com) The first humans were created with four arms, four legs and four eyes… They had two noses and two mouths and they terrified Zeus… He believed they had eminent powers and feared there would come a day when one would take his place as Ruler. To prevent such an incident from ever occurring, Zeus split each human in half and left them to wander aimlessly around the mortal world searching for their other half….. Their one true soul mate… Kinda gives deeper meaning to “You Complete Me”Some are lucky to find their happy ending the second time around and some are unlucky to experience the heartache and disappointment yet again. These victims of a broken heart can become despondent and banish the possibility or opportunity to love again from their lives as a self preservation mechanism. We tend to convince ourselves that we are not good enough or that we are unlucky and do nothing more than give up at this stage, instead of staying positive. If the Greek myth is anything to go by, your other half-self / soul mate will end up in your life. From my experience in life and love, I realised that there was a trend in the type of person I tended to fall in love with. Someone that was tainted in some way or another, a wounded animal, someone with a story to tell that seemed so much more compelling and victim-like than mine and I set out to save them because it was easier than dealing with my own issues in life. I was so insecure that the slightest bit of attention that I got made me feel accepted and I would enter into a relationship without thinking twice. And I fooled myself into thinking that by saving this wounded soul that I had let into my life would appreciate my efforts at helping him solve his problems and he would in turn reward me by treating me like the princess, just like in the fairy tales. For the first time in my life now, I believe that I had to go through this experience to comprehend that I had to learn to love myself (first and foremost) and feel comfortable with who I am, before I could set out to find my soul mate. I can proudly say that I am now confident with who I am and that I do love who I am. I love me. Now to set out and find my soul mate. I still believe in fairy tales
It’s the morning of my gorgeous Cameron’s 3rd Birthday. She wakes me up saying, “Mommy, the sun’s up!”
Yes! The sun is always up with you in my life <3
